Emerson High has raised more than its academic standards.

Todd Eric Andrews was the object of my affection for a year or so, and much like the ever beautiful Lee Montgomery, made one more movie after the one they are most remembered for and then disappeared into obscurity. It’s highly possible that Todd is indeed Dirk Benedicts secret lovechild, after all he shares Dirk’s unwavering hairdo, and Dirk is a giant man-whore whom I love with all my heart. I just made that up. The paternity/man-whore part that is, I really do love Dirk. It is a somewhat plausible theory though. But I digress, who knows how old and horrible Todd looks now, but what the hell. Who cares?

Zapped Again is of course, the sequel to the film Zapped with Scott Baio (I heard a rumour that Joanie loves Chachi means Joanie loves Penis in Singapore, and thus was the most watched pilot ever there). It is pretty much the same movie re-hashed for the late eighties but it is nonetheless cool. How can you say no to a movie about a telekinetic undersexed teen with a penchant for using his powers for the removal of women’s clothing? Well I sure as hell can’t, but I’m guessing you already knew that. It’s kind of weird that inside the body of this twenty something female is a horny male teenager. Wait, that sounded wrong.

Oh yes, the movie.

Kevin is the new kid in town and due to his mothers career in real estate he has moved around so much he has been to a massive six high schools in two years (thats terrible parenting). Needless to say he has a little trouble making friends and on his first day, after deciding to strike up a conversation with Amanda, the prettiest girl in bike shorts the whole school, he gets himself in an altercation with her boyfriend Wayne and his jock mate Cecil, making them late for ceramics. Oh no!

After a disastrous day at school, Kevin decides to stop in at the Wonder Weiner on the way home, who are looking for staff, despite the fact that they have one customer throughout the duration of the whole movie. The Wonder Weiner is populated by a number of dorks, except for Lucy – a geeky but pretty, shy girl who goes to Kevin’s school and uses the “downtime” at Wonder Weiner to get paid while she studies.

Social Clubs are of vast importance at Emerson High, and Kevin takes a wander to see what’s on offer when he comes across Amanda, Wayne & Cecil signing up members for the Key Club – the place to be for Jocks & Cheerleaders. Wayne of course doesn’t allow Kevin to join, leaving him with only a few options – one of them being the Science Club, of which Lucy is a member. Kevin soon realises that it’s Wayne and the Key Club that seem to dish out all the crap in the school and everyone else seems to take it.Things look set to change however when Kevin discovers a hidden wall cavity behind a picture of Albert Einstein in the science lab, filled with bottles of “prune juice” belonging to Barney Springburrow (Scott Baio in Zapped). Wayne and Cecil bust into the lab and force Kevin to drink the putrid concoction, which makes him pass out. Thinking they have poisoned him, they flee the scene, but what Kevin actually drank was a potion for telekinesis. The fun starts and the clothes fly when Kevin discovers just how useful his new powers actually are.

The annual Penguin Relay is fast approaching, and Kevin suggests that the Science Club enter, but the other members disagree. They tell him that the Key Club has always won the Penguin Relay, but Kevin isn’t prepared to take their crap any longer, and despite the Key Club’s best efforts to cheat, and a little help from Barney Springburrows magic prune juice, the Key Club is beaten for the first time ever. Amanda, who is the homecoming queen, has to kiss the winner. But the kiss she plants on Kevin goes beyond her homecoming queen duties. Wayne is furious, and poor Lucy is heartbroken.

With Kevin and the Science Club keeping the Key Club on their toes, Amanda starts to discover how much of a jerk Wayne really is and asks Kevin out on a date to make Wayne jealous. Kevin is oblivious to this, but Lucy can see right through her. Lucy is falling for Kevin, but he is too preoccupied with the homecoming queen to notice. She feels invisible, but Kevin thinks more of her than she realises.

Wayne can’t stand being shown up by a science club dweeb and has plotted revenge against Kevin for everything he has done since starting at Emerson high – planting all sorts of questionable items in the Albert Einstein wall safe, and his efforts could get Kevin kicked out for good. Kevins last bottle of prune juice is confiscated along with the other items, and it looks like Wayne has actually won. He’s making the Science Club work the Key Club Booth at the homecoming festival, and has learned that Kevin is allergic to tomatoes. He’s making Kevin dress in drag and perform a cheerleading routine and handing out tomatoes to the audience. But unknown to him, Kevin and the Science Club have spiked the Key Club’s free food with itching flea medication. He’s going to have his fair share of problems if Kevin can get his hands on the confiscated bottle and get around the tomato thing.

Not the most original story in the world but it’s still fun with lots of naked cheerleaders boobies and cheesy practical jokes. There’s also cameo appearances by Linda Blair as Miss Mitchell and Karen Black as the Spanish teacher. Zapped Again is one of those fun movies that I throw on every few months. I dare say I like it more than the original!

IMAGES

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SOUNDTRACK

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1. She’s Gonna Get It – Leo Swift
2. Inside Out – Michael Lanning and Rick Bell
3. Yo Pancho! – Pancho D. Rock
4. Movies – Electra
5. Fast, Fast Food – Twist-O, Brat and Mugzy
6. Under My Spell – Ellie Baer
7. Say You Will – Sue Shifrin
8. Shake – The Einsteins
9. If I Didn’t Love You – Esther Terry
10. We’ll Take The Rap – Twist-O, Brat and Mugzy
11. Everybody’s Crazy – Greg Khin
12. The Magic Touch – L.C. Robinson

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